You ain’t a net denizen if you don’t know about the hoopla surrounding the release of Rockstar’s Grand Theft Auto IV.
The last game I played with any real compulsion was hide in a bale of straw from the farmer with the gun and the rabid dog. I was 9 and my Sinclair 48k Spectrum had over heated after a zealous neighbour denied its simple pixelated pleasures, played Jet-Pac Willie until steam rose from the memory board.
So instead of reviewing Grand Theft myself, I’ll simply link to the New York Times who see it as ‘…a violent, intelligent, profane, endearing, obnoxious, sly, richly textured and thoroughly compelling work of cultural satire disguised as fun.’ Which pretty much sums up my life to date.
I love Google Alerts, my only criticism would be that it should also suggest alerts you should be alerted to even though you weren’t aware you needed alerting. Let’s call it, ’semantic alerts’.
Fear of defamation and not vanity mean I subscribe to alerts of websites featuring the phrase ‘Adam Martin’.
So it was refreshing to see my name come up associated with goat meat, the so called ’soccer of meats’, an analogy which needs explaining to me please?
The full article is here and I urge you to read it, but some choice quotes include:
“It’s the No. 1 consumed meat in the world,” said Scott Hollis, a goat specialist with the U.S. Department of Agriculture. “It’s very popular - except here.”
While goat meat-burgers may not appear on the menu at McDonalds any time soon, we’re glad to see a more worldly, eco-friendly meat treat gaining popularity. A brief internal poll revealed MP staffers overall like the stuff in curries, Jamaican jerk-style, in burritos and whole on the bone. MP Chicago editor Adam Peltz remembered a particularly transcendent cut he ate in Lima: “…i got this amazing leg of kid — so succulent and flavorful for juvenile meat.”
I never want to hear the phrase ‘transcendent cut‘ nor ‘juvenile meat‘ again.
It’s Friday and I usually post some pictures of scantily clad cats dancing whilst high on coke and mentos, but not today.
Today is about Techcrunch integrating video comments via Seesmic. El Arrington’s carefully worded post, is keen to introduce this new tool, but not too keen lest he as an investor be seen to be promoting Seesmic over and above other video comment plugins, Viddler for one. I’m an Arrington fan, if I could buy a cake mould of his face, I’d make a sponge cake and decorate it with little sprinkles representing metaphorical pixels…
(note to self: Arrington Moulds - start-up opportunity, target early adopter iPhone wielding non-diabetic market, huge growth potential, mass disruption of conventional cake mould business models, aim to be the Google of Bakery, what a tag line!)
… But please just say ‘yeah this is cool’ rather than pussyfoot around covering all bases, we love Techcrunch because it has bite. Read the rest of this entry »
Paul Graham provides a damning and insightful look at the state of the modern VC.
Choice quote:
‘Of course, the reason startups do better when they turn down acquisition offers is not necessarily that all such offers undervalue startups. More likely the reason is that the kind of founders who have the balls to turn down a big offer also tend to be very successful. That spirit is exactly what you want in a startup.’
I started using Twitter downloaded every Twitterific, Twittertwatter app I could find and got a little bored with it all. That was 9 months ago and now I’m proud to say that my gestation period is over, my Twitter baby is newly born with a full head of hair (creepy) and a name, a name I’m frankly not too keen on, but at least it has a name.
‘Jason’
Or to be more specific Jason Calacanis, the ‘Greek-Irish American internet entrepreneur and blogger’ (according to Wikipedia).
I would have preferred ‘Om’, ‘Michael’ or even ‘Kevin’ but I’ll take Jason.
Yahoo? Google? Poodle? Doodle? Microsoft? Trendy Loft? News Corp? Boozy Whore? Pah! I’m done with it all, it’s all good for the internet and equally horribly horribly bad and did someone mention AOL , quick pension hell!
Mike Arrington gives good summary over at TechCrunch.
Hands where we can see them, this has to be the greatest tech April Fool of them all via Techcrunch:
Twatr.net is trying to keep a low profile but according to the founders it’s basically a Twitter for adults. The site is SFW right now and they’re building out HD video and image streaming/sharing along with some impressive audio features for those who might be afraid to bare it all. The Amsterdam-based company just closed a 2 million euro funding round and could be the next Redtube [NSFW so feel free to do a Google search from the privacy of your boudoir].
The logline is stupendous, ‘what are your privates doing’ and the contact is twatrlord@gmail.com. Geeks with a base sense of humour, who’d have imagined it?
Annie Sprinkles writes in the comments:
‘We just need Twatr and Cockr to merge and then we’ll really have something.’
Ok, it’s Sunday, I’m in Barcelona, I’m in the office, I’ve just eaten fish and chips from an English chippy and I’m pitching ideas to myself.
Me: ‘Hi mister internet TV commissioner’
Suit: ‘Hello Spanish chippy man’
Me: ‘You read the blog?’
Suit: ‘No’
Me: ‘Are you sitting down?’
Suit: ‘You can see that I’m sitting down’
Me: ‘I’m nervous, I talk when I’m nervous’
Suit: ‘Talk’
Me: ‘A live show about Yahoo Live’
Suit: ‘Get out’
Me: ‘Yes’
I’m a little transfixed by Y! Live, currently I’m watching awecast which if you’re reading this at any other time than 17.09 on February 10th 2008 will no longer be out of focus ballet with a Christmas backdrop.
But as proof of awecast’s awesome routines, herewith a screenshot of the commentary, taken totally at random… really.
If you’re reading my recent 2 minute critique of Yahoo Live at any point that isn’t right now which is 16.31 on February 10th 2008, then chances are none of what I’ve written will make any sense and Gaston’s pre-pubescent yearnings will seem odd, whilst Amber is probably living in a safe house in Slough, or auditioning as the new face of Cover Girl or appearing on Web Celebrity Life Swap, which I just made up, but by the time you read this may well be a live show on Yahoo Live starring me also.
But to prove the live soliciting of teenage flesh did occur, I’ve taken the liberty of adding some screenshots showing Amber and the other one. I failed to get a screenshot of a young male user called Titi.
Yahoo Live is a new experiment from the Advanced Products teams at Yahoo, it says so on their blog. It also says this:
‘Y! Live was dreamed up as a way to make it possible for anyone to create their own live video experience. Broadcast the concert you’re at. Webcast your own live DJ set. Lifecast. Build your own live video speed dating application.’
I’ve given this 2 minutes of my time, adhering to the strict rules of the 2 Minute Critique and so far ashleymarie, which turns out to be two heavily made up ladies in a suburban bedroom, are being asked to reveal more of their breasts whilst being solicited for sex by French men.
Ok update, this is live you know, someone, I think Gaston Lagaffe, has accused half of ashleymarie who is really called Amber of being an ‘ogre’ and of possessing an ‘adam’s apple’.
Eek, this is addictive, Amber and the other one are sisters and they have ‘huge noses’ (their words, not mine), ok I’ll embed it now.
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